Factor #2: Our talk.

Every time you say hello to someone in the morning, and they ask you how you are, what do you answer? “Not so good”, “bad”, “things are getting harder by the minute”, “hanging in there”, “at least I am here”, etc. Or do you give a more up beat and positive answer like “I’m doing great!”, “I’m happy to be alive!”, “I’m enjoying life!”?
Whenever you are talking with a friend, about another friend who is not present at the time, how do you refer to him? Do you criticize him and talk about all his defects? Or do you praise him and mention how much you like him?
The same goes for your job, when you talk about your daily tasks, your boss or the company you work for.
Exactly what type of language do you use?

The words we say, just like our thoughts, have a great influence on how we live our lives. When we talk negatively about anything, we surround ourselves with negativity. On the other hand, every time we talk in a positive, productive way, we create a positive context that invites us to continue doing so.
However, without a doubt, this is one of the hardest factors that determine the way we live our lives, to control.

I, personally, am still in the daily struggle to ensure that the words that come out of me are positive and productive, something that, specially in the beginning, is really hard to do because we are so used to answer just to answer, that in most occasions we don’t even think about what we are saying.
Luckily, just like any other habit in life, after practicing for a while, it should become a natural practice in us.

It’s like they say: “If you don’t have anything good to say, keep quite”.

But, just how can we break the habit of talking ill about anything? This is a question that I have not been able to easily answer, since, like I just mentioned, I’m still working hard to break it myself. And even though, as the time passes, I have more days in a row talking positively, there are still a lot of times when the bad habit of talking ill, judging or stereotyping gets the best of me.

That said, there is an exercise I once read about and that I have been trying to practice lately. It consists of asking yourself three questions right before you say anything:
1- Is what I’m about to say really necessary, will it really contribute to the conversation?
2- If I say this, could I be hurting, criticizing or affecting anyone, present or not?
3- Is this really the right moment to say this?

Worth giving it a try, don’t you think?

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The comments, opinions and recommendations posted in this personal blog are my personal thoughts, and doesn't necesarily reflect those of my employer.